He placed a phone call and when I answered, he couldn’t help but slur his words in a drunken Absinthe stupor. I promptly informed him that he was to go take a very cold shower, drink two espressos and call me back when he could form full sentences. ‘I am not a common whore,’ I told him. ‘If you want common service, please go down to the Rue.’ He was apparently tired of the parfum-ridden prostitutes or his life as a drunk (one or both), or maybe I just sounded a lot like Chloë, but it was an effective maneuver. The next day, stone cold sober, he called to arrange an appointment. He was given stern treatment by me after that first drunken contact and for several months afterwards while he shaped up. I called him my ‘problem child’ and I was especially squeamish about his requests at first – nothing necrophiliac or terribly kinky, just morbid. Chloë had been slightly taller in stature and some twenty years younger than Gaston (about ten years older than I am now). She had had amazing. Soon she was drinking ale, and singing drinking songs with the locals. She sang the night away, until the coldest hour passed, and most of the tavern patrons were passed out, or home. Seeing she was too drunk to walk on her own, a man who introduced himself as Fleece Swindle, offered to walk her home. ‘I am a respectable lady!’ Divinity Mundane cried, pushing Fleece Swindle away flirtatiously. ‘Certainly, you are.’ Fleece Swindle smiled his most charming smiled. ‘Surely my lady needs aid. A lady of such respectable nature, and incredible beauty would not be safe stumbling so elegantly her way home.’ ‘Very well,’ Divinity Mundane slurred. ‘I will let you walk me home.’ Divinity Mundane and Fleece Swindle sauntered drunken through the main roads, stumbling to, and fro, and laughing together. ‘I feel like I have known you forever!’ Divinity Mundane cried, clinging to her charmingly helpful fellow friend. ‘Perhaps it is fate that I help you.’ Fleece Swindle smiled. When they finally.
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